Monday, April 12, 2010

The Scream of the Green Apple Sweater

Sometimes the knitting gods work with you and then on the other days...

I've been working on my Perfect Green Apple Sweater aka the Perfect Periwinkle Turtleneck Tube Vest by Stephanie Japel.  However, it's turned into the Less Than Perfect Green Apple Sweater now.

Why?  It's sexy isn't it?  Yes, yes it is.  A little too sexy perhaps.  I got to the point where I needed to try it on again to see where it hit at the waist to determine if I needed to add an inch or two.  So, on it went and then I took a really good look into the mirror. The ribbing begins right underneath the breasts and the stockinette might as well be lit up in blinking neon for all to see.  This sweater screams, "HERE COMES MY BOOBS!"  That would be great if I was A) in my early twenties or B) on the lookout for another man or C) a prostitute on the corner, but I'm not in my twenties (I wish) or on the lookout for another man nor am I a prostitute on the corner asking the gents if the wanna date! 

This is not the first time that I've tried it on to make sure it was fitting.  Why, oh why, was I in such denial then?  I could have saved myself a lot of work and tedium by cutting out all that damned ribbing!  I knew something wasn't quite right but I kept telling myself that it was just because it wasn't finished yet.  Yeah, it'll look better when it's finished.  Right.  Maybe it's just a case of being a blond knitter. 

There are three solutions to this problem.    Take a look at what it looks like now:

1.  I  can either frog the whole thing and call it quits.
2.  Keep it and hope that I one day miraculously get my "twenties pre-babies body" back and will look smoking hot in the tank top and all men will swoon over me.  Do men swoon?
3.  I'm leaning towards number two, but don't think that will happen and so will most likely take door number three.  This is where I frog it back to just before the bottom ribbing begins and then continue the stockinette all the way down while leaving the ribbing on the sides and adding a little bit of waste shaping to make it fit better. This way I can ignore my craving for a "twenties pre-babies body" and will look smoking hot in the tank top and the men will still swoon over me.  Yep, that sounds like just the thing. 

Now to go rip out several hours worth of work.  Sigh.
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